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August 31, 2007

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 6:44 am

File under: Week 33 of 2007

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I was in LA for the first three days this week on business. There are some REALLY weird people there, but not as weird as some of the people reported about on the blog this week. I think we had a record number of necrophiliacs. I watched Venice Beach open up on Wednesday morning when I had breakfast at the Sidewalk Café and watched as the locals opened up some shops and skateboarded and roller bladed and danced and sang and looked for some hope in garbage cans. What a place…you can watch it here.

One of our fucktards this week is Richard H. Berkey a peeping tom who got his when campers tackled him after he ran away from the womens latrine and then they tied his sorry ass to a tree until the cops arrived.

Proving that everything is bigger in Texas, this spiderweb is getting some attention and some press. Interestingly, they don’t know what kind of spider may have spun it!

I was somewhat surprisingly saddened to learn of the death of Richard Jewell whose life was ruinated when he was accused of bombing the Atlanta Olympics in 1996. (See the post immediately below as well.) It was actually that fucktard, Eric Rudolph, who was the real bomber. I think, unfortunately, that Mr. Rudolph is still alive and has all of his toes.

My best advice to you all this week: buy a lottery ticket.

If you don’t already know or have not intuited it, Senator Larry Craig from Idaho is another fucktard of the week.

Also, in case you didn’t know, this is the tenth anniversary of Princess Diana’s death. I don’t know how anyone could not know that since it is plastered pretty much everywhere.

Tell me, if you were this guy, would you move?

Leona Helmsley was mean even in death. She left $12 million to the dog and goose-egged a couple of heirs. Just wow. She gets a posthumous fucktard of the week nomination.

As predicted, Fred Thompson will announce that he is running for President. Why did he wait? His TV show must finish running episodes of him on it or the network would faced having to give equal time to all of the candidates.

Congratulations to CinLin for quitting the ciggies. I posted the above pic to help you all think about quitting if you still smoke. That pic is among those that will appear as warnings on packs sold in Europe soon.

Although somewhat ambiguous and misleading, this was my favorite headline of the week. My johnson is always determined.

Happy healthy weekends to all.

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August 30, 2007

REST IN PEACE YOU DUDE WHO GOT REALLY REALLY SCREWED!!!

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From my e-mail – Gun Control

CATAGORIES: HUMOR — FloridaBill @ 7:11 am

Don’t pick a fight with an old man. If he’s too old to fight, he’ll just kill you.

“If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.”

“I carry a gun, ’cause a cop is too heavy.”

America is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the mall.

When seconds count the cops are just minutes away.

When a reporter did a human interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him “Why do you carry a 45”. The Ranger responded with, “They don’t make a 46”.

“An armed man will kill an unarmed man with monotonous regularity”.

The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented on his wearing his sidearm. “Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you expecting trouble?”
“No Ma’am. If I were expecting trouble, I would have brought my rifle.”

“Beware the man who only has one gun. He probably knows how to use it”

“JUST LOOK WHAT HAPPENED HERE”

Officers who arrived at the ground-floor flat in the 15th district of Vienna found the body lying in a pool of blood, with body parts spread around the room. Half-eaten parts were found on a plate in the kitchen.

The 19-year-old was sitting next to the victim, his clothes allegedly soaked in blood. He reportedly greeted the officers by saying: “Just look what happened here.” What was for desert?

August 28, 2007

‘DEAD’LY CRUSH!!!

“Roderick reportedly had removed the dead woman’s stockings, ripped open the plastc covering the body, and was holding one of the corpse’s legs in the air.” Too much information…

August 27, 2007

Do you live in a Fatty State?

CATAGORIES: GENERAL NONSENSE,REASONS TO BUY DUCT TAPE — Feste @ 6:56 pm

STATE-BY-STATE ADULT OBESITY RANKINGS

1: Mississippi*; 2: Alabama; 3: West Virginia; 4: Louisiana*; 5: Kentucky*; 6: Tennessee; 7: Arkansas*; 8 (tie): Indiana*, South Carolina*; 10: Texas; 11: Michigan; 12: Georgia*; 13: Oklahoma*; 14: Missouri*; 15 (tie): Ohio*, Alaska; 17: North Carolina*; 18: North Dakota; 19: Pennsylvania*; 20: Nebraska*; 21: Iowa; 22: South Dakota*; 23: Illinois*; 24: Maryland*; 25: Virginia; 26: Kansas; 27: Minnesota; 28: Wisconsin*; 29: Delaware*; 30 California*; 31 (tie): Idaho*, Washington*; 33: Oregon*; 34: Maine; 35: Florida*; 36 (tie): Wyoming*, New Hampshire*, New York; 39: D.C.; 40 (tie): New Jersey*, New Mexico*; 42: Nevada; 43 (tie): Arizona, Utah*; 45: Montana; 46: Connecticut*; 47 (tie): Rhode Island*, Vermont; 49: Massachusetts*; 50: Hawaii; 51: Colorado.

the interactive map

I QUIT

CATAGORIES: GENERAL NONSENSE — CinLin @ 2:23 pm

On August 13th.
Smoking that is.

Say WHAT?!?!

CATAGORIES: GENERAL NONSENSE — CinLin @ 12:53 pm

Such a blond.

Michael Vick Finds Jesus

CATAGORIES: GENERAL NONSENSE — ZappaCrappa @ 12:15 pm

According to M. Vick at his press conference today, HE HAS FOUND JESUS!!!!! Can I get a big amen brothers and sisters??? I love jail house conversions. Michael Vick is AHEAD of the game as he hasn’t even made it to the big house yet. My opinion….a lame attempt to garner public sympathy….it ain’t gonna work. See ya’ Michael…enjoy the stoney lonesome.

www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,294698,00.html

Meanwhile…Jamie Foxx opened his mouth and promptly revealed himself to be a big idiot by proclaiming that this was all a “cultural thing.” I always thought torturing and killing animals was a “starter kit” for serial killers kind of thing myself. Soooooooooo cruelty to animals and killing them in the worst ways possible is a black thing….way to go Jamie. Next time just shut up…I doubt your brothers and sisters want to be associated with that idiotic statement.

www.postchronicle.com/news/original/article_21299586.shtml

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