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May 28, 2010

Month in Review (4 WIR’s)

I was fired from a job I had for 24 years one month ago. I have spent this entire time trying to find new employment and yesterday I accepted an offer to manage a claim unit at a new employer. I am facing the longest commute I have ever had, but it is a great job with a good comapny and I an VERY relieved to have a place to go Tuesday morning. It is likely that I will buy a more economical vehicle (very used) becuase my van is not going to be affordable to drive that far every day.

Being fired during this recession has been scary. I really didn’t think that my infraction of the rules at Small Cubicle Insurance Company deserved the penalty that I received. I thought I deserved a first and final warning. I was told that my years of service and performance would be taken into account. That could not have been true. I never got a poor performance review. Ever. I was there for nearly a quarter of a century. Oh well. I can’t tell you how pleased I am that I was only out of work for one month and have a new job. The oil disaster in the Gulf has lasted longer than I was out of a job.

I feel for the people of Louisiana as well as Alabama and Florida. I am angry that BP and the government seemed to be lollygagging at first and just saw an infrared picture of the area and it is shocking. Can’t they invent some machine that sucks up the water and oil, separates it and return the clean water to the Gulf and sends the oil to be made into gasoline? Why has it taken so long to get to Kevin Coster’s centrifuge idea? I read about it before I lost my job.

I also feel for the other people in this country that are out of work and struggling to make ends meet. I was going bonkers and trying to keep busy. I made certain that I got up every day, shaved and kept to a routine of searching for employment every day as my new job. I also took the opportunity to work-out daily and lose about thirty pounds (so far). I feel great and don’t plan to stop eating better and getting more excercise.

Gary Coleman just died. I am sure that Willis is heartbroken.

What do you all think about the new immigration laws in Arizona? I think that situation will get worse before it gets any better.

The weather has been fantastic and Spazticus should be here shortly to help with a minor skirmish on beer. Sal Uki may be joining us later.

Sorry to have not posted in so long. I think you can all understand. I may be sporadic in my postings from this point forward, but I will be around and watching and reading. I just can’t promise a WIR every week with my new responsibilities. No pics this post due to the dinosaur of a computer I am working with at home. It should be a boat anchor or a museum piece.

How about those Blackhawks! I think they are gonna win the Stanley Cup for the first time since before I was born.

Happy healthy weekends to all!

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April 23, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 8:00 am

File under Week 16 of 2010.

Did you hear about the Michigan Thong Bandit? If the kid wasn’t 17 years old, I would think it might have been an old roommate of mine who used to steal panties out of the laundry at our apartments. I always thought that was a tad nasty.

Check out this video of a ball player flying thru the air that went viral in the middle of the week. Nifty move.

An oil rig exploded and caught fire in the Gulf of Mexico. Eleven workers are still missing.

Leonard Nimoy is hanging up his Spock ears and will no longer be in the movies or makes appearances at Star Trek conventions. Good for you, you green blooded Vulcan!

The NFL draft had a surprise last night when Tim Tebow was drafted by the Denver Broncos in the first round as the 25th pick.

Nero fiddled (with himself) as Rome burned.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all.

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April 16, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 8:00 am

File under Week 15 of 2010.

Phil Mickelson won the Master’s for a Third Green Jacket on Sunday shutting out the rest of the field. It seemed that more attention was focused on another player who just returned after being off for five months, but in the end, it was Mr. Mickelson who got another green jacket. I played a little hooky and got some golf in yesterday. I play again on Monday and our league starts Thursday evening.

All this golf made me wonder, can Alabama remain hungry as a football team? I must say that the schedule looks pretty good to me. I didn’t know that Duke even had a football team.

I thought this was funny: How to print on your Ipad:

I called this one the moment I heard that Justice Stevens was retiring.

Maybe that is why this eagle is so distraught?

Anthony Hopkins is one serious Fucktard (the Preacher, not the actor). He seems to think that since his stepdaughter was wearing some sexy underclothes, that it is OK that he raped her and killed her mother. Oh, is that right Mr. Hopkins? You are free to go; into a pit of hungry crocodiles I would hope.

Looking for more Fucktards? Try Jose David Morales-Hernandez, also known as “Nicole”, The Divine Master” and a Mayan High-Priestess. And I thought the Mayan’s were all gone like the Incas.

Dane Bramage has been out looking for Fucktards this week and provided a link to a story about the Bishop of Tenerife, Bernardo Alvarez, who appears to want to somehow justify the abuse of pre-teens. He has clearly been drinking from the Fucktard Koolaid in mass (pun) quantities just like Anthony Hopkins (the preacher and Fucktard mentioned above).

How would you like this guy as your neighbor:

Prince Mongo

Torry Hanson from Shelbyville, TN is a Fucktard of serious caliber for returning her 7 year old adopted son to Russia, unescorted on a plane to Moscow with a note pinned to his shirt. OMG.

She is just as bad as Tommie Johnson, Jr. from Ohio who just threw out the 8 month old and the two year old kids in the trash. Tommie Johnson Sr. must be so proud!

A volcano in Iceland is screwing up travel in the rest of the world. Wow.

Finally, an RIP to a guy who was not a Fucktard, Civil Rights leader and former NAACP president Ben Hooks died yesterday. He was 85.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all.

April 9, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 8:33 am

File under Week 14 of 2010.

We have had yo-yo weather here this week, but the weekend is looking fine. It is currently below freezing, but tomorrow is supposed to be over 70.

Rescuers have once again withdrawn from the West Virginia mine in which at least 25 people were killed in an explosion earlier this week.

Also from the “I Hate it When That Happens” files comes this:

Butler nearly pulled it out on Monday against Duke coming within 2 points (and they had two shots) of the Championship. The UConn Women’s basketball team, who has now completed two perfect seasons in a row, are 78-0 and won the NCAA Championship Tuesday night against Stanford.

I have noticed the prices of gasoline rising this week like the Tulips and Daffodils. Over $3/gallon is not uncommon already.

I was not sure if this was bad news or something to look forward to: Sexually Transmitted Diseases On Rise Among Elderly.

Man gets 15 years after trying to break into jail. Huh?? Sylvester Jiles is just a Fucktard. I must say that his story did make me LOL. His picture wasn’t much better.

Thanks to Dane Bramage for the last two links.

I didn’t see any sharks at the Masters, but 50 year old Fred Couples is leading, 60 year old Tom Watson is in the hunt and Tiger made a pretty good showing on his first day back at work in 5 months.

Here are some Fucktards that just make me sick. The entire story is completely repulsive. How could they? They gang raped a 7 year old child after paying to “touch” her, then things got out of control. Nothing short of gang ass-rape and chemical castration for them all (at a minimum) will get even close to justice.

Is medicinal cannabis already legal in Illinois?

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all.

April 2, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 8:40 am

File under Week 13 of 2010.

We skipped a WIR on week 12 due to my trip to CT and the Jugg-War-on-Beer-Fest. The weather in Connecticut was AWESOME and we ate well and drank well and I still think Mr. & Mrs. Yarbz are the best hosts ever. Thanks once again. I even enjoyed the business conference on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.

I thought this sounded pretty good to me. I love a good breakfast. Sometimes we have it for dinner at my house.

Remote control condoms? Believe it:

Perennial Fucktard Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist Church may soon find themselves in the Supreme Court. Seems that the father of a fallen Marine was ordered to pay $16k in legal fees to the church. He has said he isn’t paying until he hears from the Supremes. I’d like to hear from you on the subject. As we have said before, When Phelps dies, I am going to his funeral with a sign that says “God hates Bigots” or “Thank God for Dead Bastard Preachers” or something like that. I would very much like to piss on his grave. We could have a JuggFest at his funeral! Bluntly, I would personally like to see an IED shoved up “Reverend” Phelps bunghole and watch him assplode.

The best news of the week: the weather here. I spread a half ton of mulch in the flower beds, hit some golf balls and played with the dogs extensively this week. I love warm weather!

I found this story about dead babies to be disturbing. I suppose they can take care of themselves, but this was frightening.

Plans for the weekend? Final Four at SalUki’s and getting the pool cover out of the pool that my cute golden retriever puppy has now pulled all the way in. She also chewed the water bags, so there was nothing left to keep the cover out of the pool. Maybe we will turn the pool into a duck pond? I know Yarbz was having pool issues too. If the rain holds off, perhaps a bonfire? Who knows? I am just happy that Spring is springing up all over.

Finally, my choice for Fucktard of the Week is Democratic Congressman Hank Johnson from Georgia (new home to JorsaBeck) who is scared that if we send 8,000 Marines to Guam that it may “capsize”. Are you kidding me? From what I heard, I don’t think it was an April Fool’s joke. I think he is just a dumbass.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy Easter weekends to all.

March 12, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 9:00 am

File under Week 10 of 2010.

Whaddya think about this headline: Lil Wayne Going To Jail Is Like Elvis Being Drafted?

Congrats to the U-Con Women’s Basketball team for going 71 & 0. Very impressive.

Rodney Alcala was bachelor number one at one time on the Dating Game. I think he is now Fucktard number one this week. What a story. Kill him quickly.

Nathanial Brown is Fucktard number two. He thought his bosses were too hard on him when he was late for work or slept on the job.

Up third in our weekly parade of Fucktardary is Jihad Jane, otherwise know as Colleen LaRose. What an idiot.

Sorry for the short version this week, but I have been swamped with work and am still trying to recover my health. Plus, I still can’t upload a freaking picture onto this blog. I think my computer hates me.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all.

March 5, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 9:00 am

File under Week 9 of 2010.

March came in like a baby lamb on Monday after the conclusion of the Winter Olympics in Vancouver. There were some great moments.

February and March have also proven to be difficult times for me as a parent. I won’t share the details here (and if you know them, please don’t comment on them in this forum). Suffice it to say that teenagers can be very tough on their parents. Nuf said.

I have been suffering from a bout with pneumonia for the last two weeks. It has taken a toll as I have been forced to catch up a little with The View and Oprah (not really). My work has suffered and I am weeks behind and may never get caught up. That will not stop me for gearing up for JuggFest on 3-19 which happen to correspond to the 50th annivesary of the birth of Yarbz. Two weeks and counting.

On Wednesday, I caught a few minutes of the Tyra Banks Show. Why this woman has her own TV show/podium/soapbox is beyond me, but I digress. They had two girls on who were models and promoting something they called BIO. It stands for Beauty Inside and Out. The two teen models had both prepared videos for the show. The first featured a young Caucasian woman who took off her jewelry and her make up during her video and said that people from her “generation” would be making consumer decisions based on how women were featured in advertising. Those products whose adverts used women as objects would be ignored and boycotted. The second video was made by a young African American woman whose message was basically the same, but she had a real attention grabber at the beginning of her video that started by her saying the words “bitch” “ho” and “slut”. She asked if the music industry was listening because any commercial enterprise that featured women degrading themselves and “bouncing around while dollar bills were being thrown at them” was destined for failure due to the new BIO efforts. I report this only because of the delicious irony that immediately followed when the show went to a commercial after Ms. Banks had gushed all over these two and lavished them with praise for “the cause”. Note this was coming from one of the world’s most famous supermodels. The commercial that immediately followed had a beautiful women coming out of a pool while adjusting the front of the bottom portion of her very skimpy bikini. God, I love truth on TV. I wanted to throw dollars at it. Hypocrites piss me off. And let’s not forget that Ms. Banks also has another show that compares the assets of various women who want to be America’s Next Top Model, a show I find to be cruel and humilitating to the contestants (but I have only seen a few moments of it). Is she trying to look stupid or just trying to make herself feel better that she is part of the problem (if in fact there is a problem, cause I ain’t real sure).

Twenty three year old Jeremiah Scott leads our list of Fucktards this week. OMG.

In a story that combines both hypocrisy and Fucktardary, check out this one on CA State Senator Roy Ashburn.

One more this week: Jessie Canfield. Another OMG for this young Fucktard.

Here is a little tidbit for Yarbz: Cuse #1 for first time in 20 years. I still think Kansas will be the team to beat in the tournament that begins soon.

Is gun ownership a fundamental right in America? I certainly think it is and so did the founding fathers.

In case you were wondering, It’s official: An asteroid wiped out the dinosaurs.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all.

February 12, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 9:00 am

File under Week 6 of 2010.

What a week.

After the Super Bowl last Sunday, snow in the MidAtlantic and in the Midwest were the big stories this week. Today, it looks like the Deep South is getting hit pretty hard.

Happy birthday on Tuesday of this week to my dad. My son has a birthday next week. Happy birthday gentlemen.

From the “I hate it when that happens” files comes this story about a guy who will now dance like he has two left feet.

In addition to the snow, we had an earthquake that awoke us on Wednesday morning. We knew what it was immediately and got confirmation soon thereafter. It was not that bad, but did keep me pretty tired for the rest of the day since it happened at 3:59 am.

RIP to Fred Morrison, inventor of the “Pluto platter”; better known as the Fruisbee.

Beer is good for your bones. Beer is good for your bones. Don’t you just want to shout it from the rooftops?

Toyota continued to take it in the ass for a second week, recalling even more vehicles and on Wednesday, Honda joined in the fray.

Fucktards of the week:

Scott and Andrea Bass. They locked a 14 year old in the bathroom or a closet for week on end without food or water. How could they?

This yet to be named school staffer in Knoxville, TN who shot the principal. Dumbass.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all. Don’t forget Valentine ’s Day is Sunday.

January 29, 2010

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 9:28 am

File under Week 4 of 2010.

I got to chase my golden retriever puppy around for about two hours last night in the frigid temps (10 or below). I may never let her off a leash again. There is a wolf moon tonight if she escapes again, at least I will have some illumination.

So it is the Saints and the Colts in the Superbowl. Unless the Saints put Manning on his back (much like they attacked Favre) they can’t win.

New rules for truckers and bus drivers: No texting. This is a good thing.

There is only one possible caption for this mug shot:
Gary Coleman
What you talking bout Willis? Once again, the media uploader does not want to function for me. You’ll just have to click the link.

Perhaps he was reacting to this headline:

Man Caught with 44 lizards in his pants.

or this story:

California School District Embarassed

Nancy Kerrigan’s brother Mark has been arrested and charged in their father’s death. He is our Fucktard of the Week.

From the I hate it when this happens file comes this story about a man who wasn’t quite dead yet.

The afterquake in Haiti continues to shock and awe.

Finally this week, RIP to author J. D. Salinger, maybe now you can be all the recluse you want to be.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all.

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