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March 27, 2014

Now THAT is a pothole

As Winter slowly (very very slowly) fades away, Northerners are left to deal with the aftermath: potholes. Each and every year when the snow and ice recedes, potholes get created by the freezing and warming pavement and being driven over. They are dangerous and can pop a tire or wreck your suspension. Smart cars, bikes and children often get lost in these things. The one in this picture is from East Lansing, MI but it could just as easily been from Chicago:

pot hole

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December 31, 2013

“HOE CANADA”

Perhaps the new slogan for tourisn in Canada should be:

YOU CAN IN CANADA

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November 18, 2013

I soooo caught this live…

All is well in Northern IL after yesterday’s storms. Yarbz and I were in post JuggFest football watching mode yesterday when the dang tornadic activity began and the Bears game was delayed by two hours (good call by them, it was dangerous). He and my wife both witnessed this event when I yelled, “is that a man buttfucking a cow in that sign in the corner?”. My wife paused the pic and Yarbz took a picture. He is convinced in was a sheep and not a cow. Surprisingly, Ed Curran did not mention it and they did not use that picture again. We had a very good laugh.

October 29, 2013

Halloween Hijinx

CATAGORIES: GENERAL NONSENSE,SCARY STUFF,TRUE HUMOR — FloridaBill @ 9:32 am

I really don’t know why, but I found this to be hilarious.

May 24, 2013

Great Golf Quotes

CATAGORIES: TRUE HUMOR — FloridaBill @ 10:15 am

Great Golf Observations

1. These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow.
~ Sam Snead

2. I was three over today: One over a house, one over a patio and one over a swimming pool. ~ George Brett

3. Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a 7 to do that. ~ Jim Murray

4. The only sure rule in golf is – he who has the fastest cart never has to play the bad lie.
~ Mickey Mantle

5. Sex and golf are the two things you can enjoy even if you’re not good at them.
~ Kevin Costner

6. I don’t fear death, but I sure don’t like those three-footers for par. ~ Chi Chi Rodriguez

7. After all these years, it’s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye. ~ Chi Chi Rodriguez

8. The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree. ~ Brian Weis

9. Swing hard in case you hit it. ~ Dan Marino

10. My favorite shots are the practice swing and the conceded putt. The rest can never be mastered. ~ Lord Robertson

11. Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~ Jack Benny

12. There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two different games, one played in the air, and the other on the ground.
~ Ben Hogan

13. Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you’re the best.
~ Jack Nicklaus

14. The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf. It’s almost a law. ~ H. G. Wells

15. I never pray on a golf course. Actually, the Lord answers my prayers everywhere except on the course. ~ Billy Graham

16. If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play at it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.
~ Bob Hope

17. While playing golf today, I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake. ~ Henny Youngman

18. If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~Jack Lemmon

19. You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work. ~ Lee Trevino

20. I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.
~ Lee Trevino

January 17, 2013

Manti Te’o and his imaginary zombie GF

Hats off to Deadspin for this fantastic and amazing article. Even if they guy was duped or was the victim of a sick hoax, the story is phenomenal and a brilliant piece of investigative journalism (which we thought was dead). Notre Dame has known about this since December 26, the day after Manti did not get what he wanted for Christmas (a real flesh & blood gf or bf??) and a couple of weeks before the BCS Championship. Clearly, they were in on the spin, if not a full-fledged cover-up. How will this story effect his draft status? He allegedly only learns of the hoax when the dead gf called him again to say that she was no longer dead (i.e.: a zombie?).

Let’s the jokes begin.:

Brent Musberger thinks Manti’s gf is HOT.

Manti and his GF were also strangely missing from the BCS Championship game.

To his credit, he didn’t treat her badly and didn’t double-tap her after sex.

I have had imaginary gf’s before, but nothing quite so elaborate. Usually, they last about five minutes. OK, maybe four.

At least AJ McCarron’s gf (an Auburn student) is real and comes to his games.

Future POTUS?

Soon to be drafted by the Los Angeles NFL franchise.

“These Te’o jokes are all very funny but let’s all try and remember that a person who never existed is dead.” – Seth Meyers

Please add any you would like in comments…

August 1, 2012

Road Rage Revenge

CATAGORIES: FEEL GOOD STORIES,i love it when this happens,TRUE HUMOR — FloridaBill @ 10:41 am

This look like something I might do. It made me laugh.

May 30, 2012

OMG


This is just too much. Romney now has the delegates for the nomination and then can’t even spell. W. T. F. ??

I am so glad I am leaving for vacation next week. Turks & Caicos, here we come!!!

May 3, 2012

Amusing or terrifying? You be the judge.

CATAGORIES: FASCINATING,Poodah Ben Purr,TRUE HUMOR,VIDEO,WTF — FloridaBill @ 10:58 am

Check out this video of a lion trying to eat a toddler that is (sort of) dressed in zebra stripes. What say ye? Vote in comments.

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