CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 8:00 am

File under Week 42 of 2009.

I missed seeing Conspiracy Dude last weekend due to over imbibing too early on Friday afternoon and getting a new puppy named Bailee (or Baily or Bailey or Bailley, maybe BayLee? Her middle name is Mogul.) who is way smart and very fun and demanding. I should have pics shortly. She and our older dog, Roxy, have worked-out a play arrangement that is both cute and frightening to witness.

Now that we have named the Baby (Kira Ann) of Spazticus and his bride and our new puppy, here is a list of the manliest names ever.

As predicted, Chicago was not awarded the Olympics last week. So we all get a trip to Rio in 2016! I hear it is a great place to go if you want to get kidnapped or murdered while wearing a thong. Let’s hold off on any travel plans until after London in 2012.

This is what I expect my headstone (if I have one) to say based on how much I worked this week. Next week, my two work partners are on vacation and I get to train a new one. Oh rapture! I wish the French (who get more vacation than anyone in the world) would stop their bitchin.

From the I hate it when this happens files comes this story about a woman who fed herself to her pet bear by accident. I hate it when that happens.

Anyone out there interested in a job as a pot critic? Seriously. Perhaps Carl Sagan would have applied (if he was still alive).

And now to our list of this week’s Fucktards of the Week:
Darren Daily. How could he? Death penalty. Now.
Dustin Hilt. Joseph Mattox and his best friend Gerald Calbeck, are all Fucktards for both starting and finishing the killing of Keighley Ann Alyea.
Raymundo Herrera, who sprayed his neice with lighter fluid and set her ablaze, is a Fucktard for doing so because SHE INTERRUPTED HIM WHILE HE LISTENED TO MUSIC!
Damon D. Thompson is a Fucktard for slashing the throat of a UCLA Lab Student.

This morning, it was anounced that President Barack Obama has been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. Soon, he will also be asked to play for the Lakers, will be knighted by the Queen of England and picked by Mick Jagger to replace Keith Richards as lead guitar for the Rolling Stones. They will also be renaming the prestigious award in honor of the President, adding his face to Mount Rushmore (and of course remaning it in his honor as well) and his image will also replace that of Benjamin Franklin on the $100 bill. Anyone wishing to worship at the Church of Obama is instructed to contact Harry “Balls” Reid.

Enjoy your freedoms and happy healthy weekends to all.