Orinthal James Simpson
Once again, the world finds itself enchanted with the prospect of O.J. Simpson spending a lot of time behind bars; where he belongs. After nearly decapitating his ex-wife and a waiter about twelve years ago, now he is charged with burglary and other crimes. There is audio tape, which will certainly be used by the defense team (RIP Johnny Cochran) to suggest the entire thing was a set-up. I think they should charge him with false arrest, unlawful detention and several other felonies in addition to the robbery, assault and now, kidnapping charges. Trial of the Century part deux begins today.
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What a dumbass. My big bitch is that yet, once again, we are going to inundated with hours of meaningless TV coverage over the stupidest subjects.
Celebrity Coverage Guideline:
Reporters will report EVERY rumor regardless of it’s merit. (Sources tell Fox News that Michael Jackson bathes in the blood of kittens and eats their tails while masturbating to pictures of landscapes done in pastels)
Talk to anyone who has ever been connected to them no matter how insignificant the relationship. (We now have Anna Nicole Smith’s hairdresser’s 2nd cousin on the phone for an interview to talk about Anna’s drug use).
Show a picture or video of the spartan conditions that the accused will be living in…discuss it for half a day or so. (Yes folks, THIS meager cell is where Paris will have to live for the next week! (Look at this! An open toilet and a bed with a thin mattress on it…HOW will she survive in here? Back to you Jim)
Rehash EVERYTHING they have EVER done that is newsworthy…or not…usually good for half a day’s coverage. (Well folks…we want to remind you that this ISN’T OJ’s first run-in with the law…he was given detention in 9th grade for pulling a girl’s hair. Shouldn’t someone have seen this coming back then? Won’t someone PLEASE think of the children?!?!?)
Last…get every insignificant expert to come in for an interview about the case and their predictions. (Hi, Larry King here and I have in front of me Suzy Rottencrotch, a defense attorney in flat lick, Kentucky and Robert Hangemall, a prosecutor from Battle Creek, Michigan, and Betty Likemytits, a server from Hooters and they are going to tell us what is and what happen to OJ over the next few weeks.)
It hasn’t even started and I’ve had enough already.
Oh, I think you are off to a fine start my friend. Well done. It is merely the beginning. Did you see what Fred Goldman said? I will endeavor to quote: “I hope this is the last time he (Simpson) gets away with anything.” Gets away with it? I don’t think he meant what he said, but it may foreshadow events yet to be determined…
OJ who??????????
Is that the guy that when I see on TV I immediately turn the channel?
Whaddadeek…
LMAO@Zappa - I sure do miss you and your funny commentaries. I’m going back to my hole now - I’ll check in again in a month or so. Getting ready to work a lot of overtime or drink alot - not sure which - LOL. Either one ought to be a lot of fun! : ) Oh and I like the bike Yarbz! Beautiful!!! : ) Would ask for a ride - but 1. you don’t know me 2. we live too far apart and 3. I’m sure you only let pretty women on your bike - LOL - but I hope you enjoy it and are really careful on it. And remember: Don’t drive faster than your Angel can fly!!!